Sammy Adams…Grow Up!

The (D)Evolution of Sammy Adams Lyrical Content

By: Young Bro Hard

“A couple rounds going down like waAAAAaaater/ I wanna go all night longer.”

Oh, Sammy, only a lyrical genius like you could possibly find a way to rhyme the word ‘water’ with ‘longer’.  Here is my guess on how that writing session went down.

Sammy: Fuck, I’ve already exhausted every English word in the dictionary that rhymes with ‘alcohol,’ what do I do?

Sammy’s Ex-Frat Bro who continues to mooch off his money and fame: How about ‘water’? That’s a liquid too, am I right?

Sammy: Yeah bruh, but water doesn’t get me schwasted… WAIT, I got it. Let’s slap a shit-ton of autotune on this motherfucker, (that way hoes think it rhymes), and then add a fourth-grade reading level simile to make water synonymous with booze!

(hardcore high fives are exchanged…the end)

But seriously, where does this kid think he is going? Quick reality check for you Sam…You. Are. Not. In. College. Any. Longer. Please. Stop. Making. Empty. Party. Music.

The thing that disgusts me more than anything else is that so many other artists have been able to switch their ‘College-rap’ persona successfully and continue down their hippity-hop career path. Asher Roth is a perfect example of a kid who got his fame off of one party record but then managed to establish a name for himself as one of the most diverse and lyrical rappers of his age bracket.

Honestly, I think I figured out why Sam keeps releasing songs that make me want to smash my speakers in to my forehead and grab the nearest pencil to push through my ear holes…He’s been drunk this entire time! Like, he just hasn’t sobered up since he started college/rapping. His brain is so clouded with Four Loko and Natty Light that he has no idea that he’s even making all this awful music! He keeps recycling the same garbage lines in every song, and rapping about the “supa hawt chicks” he bangs on the regular. So listen here you wanna be Van Wilder, grow up. Nothing is more pathetic than graduates who stick around their college campuses long passed their welcome.

MC Lars – Mild Boy (MGK parody)

You might think to yourself, “Man, I really hate this MC Lars guy…what a lame ass parody video.” I don’t blame you, it is indeed kind of lame, BUT if you can make it to the 2:20 mark, he totally redeems himself. I mean seriously, how many times can Machine Gun Kelly reference Kurt Cobain before we require him to write some actual lyrics? Oh, and don’t forget to tie your shoes! MGK is a big advocate for making sure all of his fans never trip over their shoe laces. #LaceUp

Guess What We Found…

I haven’t been this happy since Lance Bass came out of the closet. Shout out to @SeeMeDaggie who is the lucky winner of an hour-long meet and greet with The Baha Men…He was able to find the “I Saw The Sign” blogstar remix video (shot by the one and only Jon Kilmer) so that we all may watch and die happy! You have to watch it on Vimeo though…so get ready to let it load for a half hour. I hate Vimeo.

Anyone Remember The “I Saw The Sign” Remix from Mike Stud, Kinetics and Hendersin?

Undoubtedly, one of the most embarrassing songs to ever hit the interwebz, Mike Stud, Kinetics and Hendersin’s remix of “I Saw the Sign” by Ace of Base has secured a spot in the BMAD hall of fame. The only thing more embarrassing than the original video (which has been marked as private on Youtube…good call guys) would be if someone were to record themselves in their car rocking out to this pathetic excuse for a song…turns out, that video exists, thank GOD!

Watch as this typical blogstar fan lives out his dream of rocking the stage as he drives to school where he will surely endure a day of ridicule and harassment from his peers for being a complete tool. I for one, would never record what I do in a car and put it on Youtube, but this dickhead did, and for that, we thank you!

Sidenote: If anyone can find a link to the original video, please send it my way. Anyone who succeeds in this task will win a lifetime supply of Chocolate Teddy Grahams and a one hour meet and greet with The Baha Men.

World Trayd – Like A Hampster

I’m amazed this video hasn’t gone viral…If you like Lil B, RiFF RaFF, 2 Chainz, giving yourself a dutch oven, etc., you’ll really enjoy this song and video. Check out this dude’s video description from Youtube:

Track dedicated to my haters all those that look like a hamster and all those that don’t fresh track delivered to you straight follow your boy on twitter @worldtrayd world trayd aka mamma ape world trayd music world trayd management gett on me when you can always hard with those hamster haters and my fans. Stayin on the management game but producin a mixtape with my boys put myself out there and gonna go ham like 100 hamsters dont lie hahaha. Aye my boy DMiller held down with me again on this one check him out he has got his own thing comin so look for that and your boy Wolrd Trayd.

2 Chainz – Birthday Song (feat. Kanye West)

2 Chainz, Just Some Good Old Fashioned Family Friendly Fun!

By: Some New Broad

Guess who’s gearing up for a spot on the next release of Kidz Bop? That’s right, our dear friend 2 Chainz. At least, that seems to be the goal he had in mind when changing his name from “Tity Boi” to “2 Chainz” last year. Here’s an ACTUAL quote from Mr. Chainz…I can’t even make this shit up:

“I just came up with it [the name change] yesterday over a big bowl of kush for breakfast…Lately like the last year or so, I’ve been saying it in introducing my records like ‘2 Chainz!’ and kinda making it family friendly.”

I’m really excited that this move has validated activities like ‘pimpin’ and ‘trappin’ as family friendly, because I was getting a little worried that my parents weren’t going to give me what I wanted for my birthday…A big booty hoe, of course!

But here’s the craziest part about the name change…It actually WORKED. Doesn’t give you a whole lot of faith in humanity, does it? Since the name change, 2 Chainz’s sales hit #58 on Billboard and he’s recorded tracks with Kanye West (see video above), Nicki Minaj, and Drake. Now he’s all over the place! Apparently as a country we just love us some “family values” in our honey bunches of kush.

Since when can you just change your name and image and suddenly appeal to EVERYONE? It’s like nobody noticed that this is the EXACT SAME GUY that sucked last year! If I change my name to John Mayer will Taylor Swift write a doe-eyed he-fucked-me-over-because-I-loved-him-for-some-reason-and-still-want-him-back-yay-blonde-hair song about me? (This is a life goal). Seriously though, are we dumb enough as music listeners to not care that everything is the exact same (see: pimping, trapping) and believe that a new rap name really defines a new you? I get that people do change, albums have different messages, and people like Christina “X-tina” Aguilera have successfully gone through more changes than Huey Mack preparing for a date with Mike Stud. But, even if Justin Bieber gets a hair cut that makes him look less like a lesbian, he’ll still have the same level of talent, musicianship, and the ‘swag’ that ex-swagger-coach-Ryan bestowed upon him, right?

It all comes down to marketing. Scream your stupid name in a song enough times and you can brainwash the  public into thinking that you are actually relevant/talented. If you listen to 2 Chainz and honestly think to yourself, “Wow, what great musicianship,” then you deserve a brand new hole in your head. You listen to 2 Chainz because you are told to listen to 2 Chainz and he’s popular right now because you’ve been made to believe that he is popular. Nothing but a bunch of mindless goddamn sheep.

Shout out to every blog who raced to post his new video today! For real, no way you’re part of the problem.

 

RiFF RaFF Freestyle on Sway in the Morning…

This dude is famous…people pay to see him in concert…people are allowing this dude to continue making “music.” Today, he was on the radio show “Sway in the Morning.” If anyone needs me, I’ll be banging my head against a rock for the next couple hours.

3 Dickheads w/ Guitars – SEC Bound

It seems as if Mizzou trying to become the laughing stock of not just the SEC, but major Universities in general. How many garbage ass songs does one University need to release before someone steps in and teaches them a lesson? I’ll be at Mizzou next weekend for the Georgia game, and if I run into any of these little turds, I can assure you, tears will be shed.

 

Why?….Goddamn Hipsters

Here’s a video that will make you want to choke a puppy. Gotta give it to them for the perfect band name though. Goddamn hipsters.

Huey Mack Changes Video Description…

Huey Mack BadMusicAllDay.com

I guess Huey re-thought his choice of words after reading our post about how “edgy” his video was…Nice to see that we can make a difference.